The Conundrum of CalExit

I was twenty-one and talking in the kitchen with a married couple from whom I’d just rented a room. This was necessary as I had  transferred to a California State University to finish my baseball career and graduate.  As it’d been a long day I decided to call it a night.  Barely into my room I heard a large roar outside my window.  Looking out I couldn’t see anything as the roar continued to dissipate and then return.

I exited my room and headed to the front door where I stepped outside just in time to see a police helicopter almost skim the roof of the two story apartment complex while yelling over the loudspeaker to “return to your homes”.

This seemed to go on for a while before gun shots rang out.

A little later police knocked on the door and asked me if I’d heard anything.  I told them about the helicopter and the gunshots.  They said thank you and moved to the rest of the apartments.

It was 1992 and my first night in San Bernardino California.

Yep the same San Berdu (as it was referred to by the locals) that was struck by terrorists decades later.

Now to be accurate (not interested in fair) I enjoyed my time at California State University San Bernardino.  The campus was nice, many of my professors were excellent, my coach was a dream to play for, and I was introduced to Socrates, John Locke, Abraham Maslow and the Gambler’s Fallacy.

Continuing the accuracy requires me to say my apartment complex was nice enough and walking distance to the school.  The rest of San Bernardino was like most cities in Southern California’s inland empire.

Packed housing structures and businesses, crowded streets and highways, with just enough graffiti, trash, and crime to signify gang presence.

In other words a hole.

25 years later.  Things haven’t improved.  Sadly this is a microcosm of what was once the Great State of California and brings me to my point.

Over the last month I’ve received questions or comments from all over America asking about the infamous CalExit.

Freedom loving Americans see what appears to be roving gangs of Democrats marauding through the streets screaming to take the REPUBLIC of California and leave the most famous REPUBLIC in the world.

It is here that irony writes itself.

I’m not sure which is of greater absurdity.  Democrats living in Republics or legal aged adults who believed Bernie Sanders was going to provide them all free healthcare and college.

CNN covered CalExit like it was the Battle of the Bulge ( who knew CNN could cover something other than missing planes and whatever Hillary told them to) and attempted to capture the moment by asking a guy, who’d spent too much time eating fast food, his opinion.

It might have been entertaining to hear however his 50 yard walk was more than his lungs could bear.

I wonder if the Democrats are giving out free exercise too.

If you are sensing a bit of amusement emanating on the page you would be correct.

California is going to leave the United States?

Nope.

The many legal and procedural hoops that would have to be attained for any State to leave is overwhelming.

Because of this I am not going to even bother walking down that road.

I am going to keep this short and sweet.

First it is called Secession Liberals.

Not Succession.

The last time the act of secession was attempted it ended badly in Sherman’s March.  The War Between the States was the most brutal war in American History.  The United States was split down the middle.  Brothers against brothers.

This was a hard time lived by even harder people on both sides.

The Walking Dead in California known as Liberals are not hard people.

They are a collection of participation trophy recipients strung out on dope and cloves whom are so laughably recognizable Jack in the Box created commercials about their incessant two a.m. taco runs.

I doubt a majority of them can spell California let alone EXIT.

Abraham Maslow is shaking his head while Socrates is nodding and saying, “I warned you about Democracy”.

Yes you did.

Any attempt by “Californians” to break away from the U.S. would be met with force.

I was born and raised in California.  I’ve competed, been educated, and served in Law Enforcement in California.

With all that said my Pledge of Allegiance is to the United States of America.

I am an AMERICAN.

If a bunch of drugged out Timothy Leary followers want to join hands with CAIR and La Raza have at it.

It will be the shortest lived attempt at “Succession” in human history.

There are plenty of Americans just like me all over California, especially Northern.

If for some reason the Jack in the Box crew et al isn’t dealt with in 48 hours I’m sure there is plenty of help all across this country more than willing to drive the one celled amoebas back into the Pacific Ocean.

We can call it community outreach and climate repair.

I can just see it now.

Lighters, bongs, and Che Guevara T-shirts all waving over their heads in surrender, like the worst participation trophies ever, while huddled in each others arms clamoring for safety pins and safer spaces.

Okay let us return from fantasy land and give you the real reason California will never secede.

The Democratic Party would never allow it.

Without California the Party of Tyranny would cease to exist.

All of a sudden California secession doesn’t sound so bad to everyone NOT in California.

Don’t ya just love the smell of a good conundrum in the morning?

Jason Kraus

www.aleadernotapolitician.com

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